Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize
