Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
