when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize