I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
