Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
