wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
