I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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