why didn't you poke me back
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize