last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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