My nipple is on Facebook.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
