I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
