there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
