so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
