Your tits are I can't wait for
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
