And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
