first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
