i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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