Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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