they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
