I wish I could punch you in the face.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
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