I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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