I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
How naked do you want me to be?
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
