We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
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