so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
