so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
