Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Randomize
