so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
