and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
