I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
he had hair everywhere except his balls
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
