rhymes with "ouble enetration"
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
