I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Farmville is her only friend.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize