Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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