my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
My penis needs a shock collar
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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