Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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