i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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