I wanna passion pit in your ass
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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