I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Randomize
