awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
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