I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I just pynch a tree in the face
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
So squirting runs in the family.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
The dick lei will go down in squad history
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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