dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
