i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Randomize