Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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