Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
