Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
