just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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