some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
It's shark week go big or go home
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize