I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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