you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Randomize
