Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
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