Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
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