I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
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